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"The Other Significant Others
fundamentally, it's become my new Bible. Trevor Noah
"An arresting work of compassion and insight." ?Lori Gottlieb
"I loved and recommend [ The Other Significant Others] to everybody." Ezra Klein
"I feel like I've been waiting for this book for my entire adult life." ?Anne Helen Petersen
Why do we assume romantic relationships are more important than friendships? What do we lose when we expect a spouse to meet all our needs? And what can we learn about commitment, love, and family from people who put deep friendship at the center of their lives?
In The Other Significant Others, NPR's Rhaina Cohen invites us into the lives of people who have defied convention by choosing a friend as a life partnerthese are friends who are home co-owners, co-parents or each others caregivers. Their riveting stories unsettle widespread assumptions about relationships, including the idea that sex is a defining feature of partnership and that people who raise kids together should be in a romantic relationship. Platonic partners from different walks of lifespanning age and religion, gender and sexuality and morereveal how freeing and challenging it can be to embrace a relationship model that society doesn't recognize. And they show that orienting your world around friends isn't limited to daydreams and episodes of The Golden Girls, but actually possible in real life.
Based on years of original reporting and striking social science research, Cohen argues that we undermine romantic relationships by expecting too much of them, while we diminish friendships by expecting too little of them. She traces how, throughout history, our society hasnt always fixated on marriage as the greatest source of meaning, or even love. At a time when many Americans are spending large stretches of their lives single, widowed or divorced, or feeling the effects of the "loneliness epidemic," Cohen insists that we recognize the many forms of profound connection that can anchor our lives. A rousing and incisive book, The Other Significant Others challenges us to ask what we want from our relationshipsnot just what were supposed to wantand transforms how we define a fulfilling life.
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A powerful narrative on platonic partnerships and how the thrill, intimacy, and commitment we seek is often found through meaningful friendship.
RHAINA COHEN is an award-winning producer and editor for NPR's documentary podcast, Embedded. Her work, often focused on social connection, has aired on numerous podcasts and radio shows, including Hidden Brain, Invisibilia, and All Things Considered, and her writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Washington Post, and elsewhere. She lives in Washington, D.C. with her husband, friends, and her friends' children.